maple leaves.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

he got angry with me
i didnt mean to cry
and i know its because he loves me.

`2:04 AM__;

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

2009: new phase of life, transition from JC to UNI

no school uniform
no waking up at 6+am 200/365 days in a year
no training regularly :(
no kessie :(
ie no dog to study with me :(

results
giving tuition
waitressing
driving
GETTING MY LICENSE TODAY
new friends
new school
more goodbyes and hugs?
hall??? (i suddenly feel very unsure whether i should really stay in hall or not)
what to join?
meeting up alot of friends
how to curb spending when there is no sch for 7mths
feeling even older & more nostalgic
more decisions to make on my own ):
my older generation of family members are getting even older and health also.......

helppppppp

patience
hope
love one another.

i must not take things for granted
i must stop living in the past again shes around no more ): i want to hug&kiss mydarling kessie so badly right now :'( dammit i dont want her gone!!! ARGHH THIS IS SO UPSETTING I MISS KESSIE SO MUCH RIGHT NOW. words cant express the magnitude of how im feeling right now
i want to spend more time with my family.

i do not like change. ): but we all gotta grow up some day,

i cant say anything you want to hear right now, im sorry.

`1:22 AM__;

Monday, May 18, 2009

today is just one of the few days where i feel very stupid for doing nothing with my life.

and nus is sending me so many emails i dno which camps to go for and do I REALLY WANT TO GO FOR SO MANY CAMPS OMGOSH. i know i get to choose which i can go for but erjie says its best to go for as many as possible and i dont know which to shortlist where to go and like i have all the time in the world to search around the nus website but im like so urghed nothing is really calling out to me more than the others. and i have to pay for camps you know?! its also too late for any regrets about any decision ive made.(:

and my driving test is in like 9 days zomg

just ytd i was feeling so contented with my life
today im freaking out by the 1000 doors opened for me. argh
and my friends are leaving singapore.
LIKE ALL THE CLOSE ONES ARE LEAVING SG
FREAK
))))))))):

and like i know im not living in poverty or i didnt lose anyone close to me (other than kessie) or like have any family issues im just whining like some spoilt brat and bah @#$%^&* im just veh bu shuang.

and to curb my spending, afterall im receiving a pay raise of 1$ perhour, IM WORKING ALMOST EVERYDAY THIS WEEK HAHAHAHA except tuesday. keeps my mind off things, but at the same time makes me want to do other things

i need something fun to do everyday.........
like, running. IM GNG TO HORTYHORTPARK WITH MY DAJIE and if we are super pro enough we might even make it to kent ridge bwahahaha.

btw tioman last week was AWESOME. it was cool i met a girl whos in nus xcountry, a girl in nus bizad (accountancy)
makes me want to join xcountry again even though i will be under sq
and not regret choosing accountancy for uni :) she said the lecturers are super good esp for 3rd and 4th year. i think i can live through the 1st 2 years :)

and then hall lehhhhhhhhh howhowhowhowhow ):
i havent blogged so much in ages

`1:36 AM__;