maple leaves.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

hahahaha im so sorry im not friends with you because im frank and boring and im not fake.

`1:48 AM__;

Saturday, March 21, 2009

i wish i didnt know so much
so that i wouldnt have to want so much
expect so much
and be so disappointed.

`12:53 AM__;

Friday, March 20, 2009

i would like to go overseas very much before i enter uni.

`1:45 AM__;

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

i really REALLy screwed my clock this week gahh. i have to wake up at 1230 for driving. and i havent even gone to bed. woke up at 230pm i should be feeling slpy now.. =/

anyway, i think i really prioritised my courses wrongly but urgh what the heck im super numb right now... just have to wait for what office of admissions post me to......... hmmzmxzxz i cant believe just 2 days ago i was panicking and stressing out about my next 4 years and now im like harharhar bumming around and thinking about what to write about myself when i apply for these 2 scholarships bloopbloopbloop.

so in midst of stressing out last week, my new feedback on work is that
i like it.
theres this girl whos damn mean to me sometimes she scolds me and makes me do all the harder/more strenuous work even after working here in 2 months at least the other waitresses treat me better! (theres no waiter except my manager hahaha) but shes behaves really close to me when shes not stressed out by customers hahaha and she gets damn stressed out easily. i think being an moe victim has made me more tolerable to pain. but it doesnt mean i dont feel irritated

ok that was completely contradicting what i said when i said i like work hahahaha. well the people treat me nice, and for some reason they like to tease me? which is quite amusing. but they are really friendly and cos of their backgrounds - from msia, china, 1fromjapan, a few singaporeans and hardly any of them speak english omg and that they have no clue about jc life. except my manager. only 3 of the parttimers are in poly (one's graduating), the rest of the workers... i not so sure.. and working there is like so-out-of-this-world. took my mind off thinking about uni . and well theyre all really nice to work with and willing to help me and fun to talk to though my chinese sucks big time so i spend half the time going HUH? (cos i dont understand/cannot hear their super fluent chinese accent properly) or keeping quiet lol.

and i like to mop the floor. hehehehhe.

i kinda like my life now. its a good break for 6 months. :) asstcoaching + driving + waitressing + tuitioning my cousins. i feel somewhat accomplished. (unless i start comparing myself with others =.=) and haiyoh actually there are so many 1000 things i can complain about but aiyah.

i am listening to joseph and the amazing technicolour dreamcoat soundtrack

i need to pack my room. i think next week i will really really pack my room. or maybe this sunday. hrmzxz.

driving at 1410! gdnight.

`6:07 AM__;

Thursday, March 12, 2009

I VEH CONFUSEDZXZXZ. I DNO WHAT I WANT and i very eager to apply

but i guess i just have to wait until after open house =.= vellly sianzxzeded right now im just going on and on and on in circles trying to make a decision when CLEARLY, i cant make a good one.,
i hope open house will really guide me somewhere.

`11:26 PM__;

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

you have no authority over me
and lucky for you i have no guts to do the same to you. dont even think of trying to find me if this is how its going to end all the time.

`2:38 PM__;

Monday, March 09, 2009

when i give you a hug

it means i care for you,
even if i hardly do much with you
even after all these years i seldom see you
im saying you still have a special place in my heart.

`3:03 PM__;

Thursday, March 05, 2009

today, i think i am happy.
i am happy to have finally fallen sick,
happy to have friends to meet up with, catch up with, still talk to, understand my sometimeswithdrawnbehaviour
happy to have sisters
happy to have nikki around
happy to have a family who loves me
happy to have cute cousins
happy to have joined the oh-so-gruelling xcountry which i may have complained about 1000x but possibly changed my life for the better and made me less shy (though i know i still am but i was WORSE REALLY.)
happy to have found a job on the first day i tried to find it
happy to have a mind that still works. i just friggin taught my cousin vectors today X_X
happy to have a memory that doesnt forget her, or ppl special to me as a matter of fact
happy to have had nice maids
happy to have so many songs to listen to
happy to have experienced so much
happy to have not experience some things yet.
happy to have a cosy home and a lovely bed
happy to be a kiasu freak with disney&cartoons in my life

so the past 2 days, ive been awake at 7am (on the 3rd i woke up at 2am and stayed up till 7+am, ytd i did stay up till 7+am), and cos im so eager to see what the news has to say about results, i'd be the only person awake in the house at that time, and i'd wake nikki up so that i can play with her for a bit while i get the newspapers+letters in the letterbox.
i sit at the front door in my pjs in broad daylight looking at the news to find NOTHING about results (though its been confirmed)
and suddenly nikki comes into the house and for the first time in years, she makes her way to my room, the toilet, the maids room, the store room as if looking for something. (shes actually not allowed into the house except the kitchen and she knows that) and being alll GRRR NIKKIIIii, i bring her out before one of my parents come out and start making noise about the pretty girl being in the house.

so after the same thing happens for 2 consecutive mornings around the same time, i speculate: the pretty dodo took about 3-4 weeks to realise kessie's missing and is looking for her.
well since nothing about A's has come out in the newspapers i'll attempt to stay up again today if i have the energy, maybe it'll say something. and i'll have to watch out for nikki too. i like sitting at the front door in pjs reading the news. its very quiet and i like the lighting outside.

`1:47 AM__;

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

LESS THAN 60HOURS TO GO OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG x_x I DONT LIKE BEING SICK THIS WEEK. i lie in bed and the phlegm accumulates and i start coughing and coughing and coughing so hard until tears start coming out its disgusting. it either disrupts my sleep or keeps me from sleeping.
but i feel glad the phlegms coming out lollzzzzzzzzz.
i cancelled work + driving + asst coaching cos i felt like crap. but now i have to stay at home all day long (apart from tuitioning my cute ahboy cousin cos of his CA exams this week)

`5:21 AM__;